In this Q&A post, we will cover all the emails that we have received since our November Q&A sessions. We do these monthly and you can feel free to submit your questions for our January Q&A here.
1) How do I truly believe that my thoughts really create? I do daily lists and so far some things have shown in my reality and some haven’t, which makes me doubt the Law.
Viktoria: You build your faith in two steps: first you start reading Neville’s work and studying it. During this phase you may even start reading other people’s success stories and building your faith that way.
The second step is testing. This is a step that really shows you how powerful you are: test it in your everyday life, with anything you can think of. Don’t only take the daily lists as a proof of this. We have covered the question about some things coming to pass and some not in the last month’s Q&A session, so I won’t repeat it. Basically, we both believe that the only way to fail is if you declare something to be a failure. So, stop telling yourself that the things that didn’t come to pass yet were a failure or that they won’t come to pass. Sometimes things take some time because we keep looking for them or doubting our own power. That’s why it’s important to keep testing it on a daily basis, as I’ve mentioned. That way you keep yourself busy with other things instead of focusing on what did or did not come to pass from your daily lists.
Here is what I do when I see that some of the things on my lists didn’t come to pass: I reread them and affirm that there is an abundance of them. If there is an abundance of them in my life, then how can I call it a failure just because I haven’t seen them in a few days?
Use everything to your own advantage in your mental diet. What I mean by that is that you have to stop affirming that you failed and start affirming that there is an abundance of everything in your life and keep affirming it everytime you notice a lack!
2) I am manifesting my marriage with my SP who is already married and finding it difficult to get out because of his daughter. They have been together for a long time and even though he no longer has emotions for her (neither does she), he is persisting in the marriage. Now, I know that I am also reinforcing this but it is difficult to ignore her as a third party when she is in his life everyday and I have to hear about her. Can anyone help out?
Ivana: If you know that you are reinforcing this story by repeating it then why are you doing this? You have two stories going on here: they don’t love each other anymore and he is free to be with you but he isn’t free to be with you because of his daughter. I hope you can see the contradictions in this story and how this isn’t helping you at all! Choose one story and persist in it. You cannot serve two masters. That’s the most common cause for people to give up: they are telling themselves two contradicting stories without realizing it and then say it isn’t working. Everything that you are seeing in your world right now is a manifestation of what you are telling yourself.
If you read through your message, it will become clear to you that you are not really imagining lovingly for yourself. You are saying that it’s difficult for you to ignore this and that’s why you keep talking about it. That’s not imagining lovingly for yourself. Imagining lovingly for yourself is telling yourself that manifesting is easy and there are no obstacles in your way.
Here is what I would do in your case: I would start by working on my mental diet and especially on things pertaining to myself. Ignore this entire situation for a little while. Now, I am not saying go no contact. You do not have to do that. Simply make everything about yourself for a while: raise your confidence, test the Law with other things, make yourself the most desirable person in your world because YOU ARE. When you see something contradicting in your world, affirm that you are the only one that he loves and that there are no obstacles in your way because you are worthy of him overcoming them and he already did that. Tell yourself that you are beautiful, worthy, deserving and lovely every day. Because you are! Tell yourself that you are good at manifesting. Tell yourself that things come easily to you and that nothing can get in your way. Because it’s can’t unless you declare that it can! Tell yourself that everything that you desire always comes into your life easily and effortlessly.
Stop worrying about the current situation for a while and completely focus on yourself. Once you are in a place of confidence, you will see that repeating this story you just wrote to us is just unnecessary.
I would also recommend using the “I remember when” technique whenever you find yourself in a situation where you have to deal with him talking about the third party, for now. He will stop, once you ignore it or make it seem like these are the matters of the past.
“I remember when he was married and talked about his wife but now he is in love with me and he is with me! His wife found somebody she loves as well. They are raising their daughter in the best way they can but they are both grown ups and treat each other with respect and there is no bad blood between anyone in this situation. Everything turned out for the best.”
3) Hello and good morning from Witherbee, NY. I have started to study Neville Goddard, Rev. Ike, and a few others, and my oh my am I blown away by the truths they preach. Sometimes I get a little stuck, and have to read the material over and over or even listen to it a few times. I am fine with that, though, and I also enjoy material coming from individuals such as yourself, because you put a spin on things I can relate to. While I can probably ask many questions, I will keep it to one. If the outer world is an expression of our inner world, how do we let go of the limitations we have picked up along the way so as to stop repeating the cycles over and over again?
Ivana: Lovely to hear from somebody all the way from NY! Thank you for your kind words, as well!
Releasing limitations isn’t hard at all. The first thing you want to do is change your mental diet so that you can see that releasing limitations is as easy as it can get. The second thing you want to do is realise that there are no limitations in your end result. It comes down to the difference between the state of the wish fulfilled and the state of the lack.
Here is an example! Let’s say you want to build a successful business. Your first state is that of wanting to build a successful business, of not yet being a successful businessman. Generally, it’s a state of not lack. Now, in this state you will perceive different things as a limitation: you don’t believe that you can be successful on your own, you don’t believe that you can have a business that will bring in a lot of money, you may not consider yourself to be “lucky” with the money, etc. However, in the state of already being a successful businessman, you would not be thinking that way. Your thoughts would align with being an owner of a successful business! In other words, you would not be seeing any limitations to the things that you already possess. So, if you are running a successful business that is bringing in a lot of money, you wouldn’t be thinking that you can’t have this, that you aren’t capable of being successful on your own.
You see, the limitations can be perceived only from the state of the lack. From the state of the wish fulfilled, you would not be bothered with seeming limitations. They are illusions. There are no obstacles to what you can achieve, unless you declare that this or that can stop you from achieving something.
So, the short answer to your question would be: keep assuming the state of the wish fulfilled. In that state, limitations do not exist.
Now, how do you get there? By persistence. Besides keeping your mental diet on point when it comes to your wish fulfilled, doing your SATS, scripting or whatever else you are doing, you should also pay attention to the way you speak to yourself. What are you telling yourself in the course of the day? That you can’t do this? That it’s hard for you to assume this state? All these things must be flipped around as well, into things that you perceive as positive, into things that align with your wish fulfilled.
And, of course, keep testing the Law with other things! That way you can bypass these illusionary obstacles and see that they only exist in the state of lack. Put it to the extreme test.
4) Why is my SP showing me hot/cold behavior? Is it a mixture or transition of my old story fading into my new story? He went from taking me to dinner, being sweet and romantic and holding my hand to basically ignoring me all weekend and saying he’s “busy”. I intend for us to be in a healthy, loving, committed relationship.
Viktoria: You have the power to look at what is happening at this moment and declare that it is a bridge of incidents. Whatever you do, do not declare that this is something that is getting in the way of your manifestation because that will keep you stuck in that place.
As far as his behavior goes, look for a reason inside of you. What are you telling yourself? That he always becomes cold after a while? Maybe you have a more general belief that says that guys always act hot and cold towards you. Examine your beliefs and see what is going on there.
One thing I would recommend to you is that you don’t react to this. I know it can be hard to have such dynamics in a relationship but the easiest and fastest way to fix it is to keep focusing on your SP being completely enamored with you. You ignore the things that sound “cold”. You acknowledge them but you don’t let them get to you or have any consequences. You can even revise them as they are happening. Your overall focus should be on how loving he is.
5) I had a question about mental diet, we are told to flip our negative thoughts into positive ones but doesn’t that mean we are giving power to our fears and doubts so that’s why we have to to flip it, why can’t we just let these thoughts come and go rather than fighting with them?
Viktoria: You are not fighting your thoughts, though. You are aligning them. If you feel like you are fighting your thoughts, I would recommend stopping for a moment and observing what it is that you are telling yourself about the mental diet in general. Are you telling yourself it’s hard? Are you telling yourself you can’t discipline your mind?
Mental diet is not about fighting the negative thoughts. It’s simply about flipping them around. If a negative thought disturbs you, take a moment to calm down and then flip it around.
You get what you focus on. Of course you can have a more nonchalant approach to the mental diet if you are disciplined enough. Instead of flipping the thoughts around, you laugh at your negative thoughts because you know the opposite is true. Even in this case you are affirming the opposite, only with a feeling, not thoughts per se. But, if you have not yet reached that level of conviction, then keep flipping your thoughts around.
Don’t overthink the technique! It’s simple and it works the way you intend for it to work. If you tell yourself it’s wrong and it shouldn’t work that way, then it won’t.
6) I am manifesting my SP back who is the person I have been wanting my whole life… But I pushed him away because of two past broken relationship fears… I don’t want a new SP as I got the man of my dreams but no contact for last 6 months, not a single “hi” text from his side… Also since we are from India and belong to two different communities here our parents don’t approve of this marriage… What should I do? I am not a newbie to Neville’s teachings as I already manifested some amazing things and people in just 6 months of knowing him but stuck with only this SP issue… Please help as I can’t afford coaching.
Ivana: Well, first of all, I want you to know that you do not have to get coaching in order to get results. Coaching is not mandatory for you to start creating better: it’s your willpower to learn and test what you’ve learned. May sound contradicting since I offer coaching as well but let me explain: reading Neville is more than enough. Each person should know for themselves whether or not they need some extra help, but more often than not, if you are not a newbie, I can help you adjust your manifesting process just a tiny bit because you probably already know it all if you read Neville and tested the Law. Of course, I will also use my personal experience but the experience that is more important is your own! Coaching is here to help you figure out what you need to adjust in order to get the results, if you feel like you are stuck, because it gives a more personalized approach.
Okay, now that we’ve got that out of the way… What you are mentioning in your email to us are circumstances. You are from India, your parents don’t approve of this marriage etc. You have manifested things before and you have probably already learned that circumstances do not matter. Not only learned but experienced as well! Instead of focusing on your current circumstances, I want you to focus on what you do want. Disregard the circumstances. You are basing your judgment of your future on your current circumstances. And yet, your current circumstances are just past manifestations. In this case, I would recommend working on your inner conversations. Go on a mental diet. See what you are saying to yourself. Not only about your relationship! It’s about you. You are the most important person in your world, remember that, always!
So, what you want to do here is figure out what you are telling yourself when it comes to the manifesting process. “I can’t do this because circumstances won’t allow it” or “I can’t keep up my mental diet”, you want to stop doing these things and change your state to the one of the wish fulfilled. The ways you can do this are numerous: SATS, mental diet, scripting, subliminals,… You get to choose. However, even if you are doing any of these other techniques, I would still recommend a mental diet. Observe your thoughts throughout the day. Are you thinking from the state of the wish fulfilled? If not, adjust your thoughts until it becomes normal for you to think that way. Assume the feeling of the wish fulfilled and think from that place. Not of it! From it.
Since your end result is marriage, ask yourself: would your current circumstances matter if you were already married to your person? They wouldn’t. Then, there is no need to concern yourself with them. All you have to do is think from the end, not of the end. In that case, all of these circumstances that you are mentioning in your email automatically fall away and have no power. Because you are already married!
7) Healing incurable illness: I have moderate hearing loss in my both ears which the doctors have deemed to be irreversible. I know I can change it using the Law but I need some guidance in how to go about it. What should my SATS scene be like? Should I visualize my inner ear hair cells to heal or focus on the end result which is being able to hear everything? I have a difficulty in visualizing the feeling of how complete hearing will sound like. Also, in terms of healing/changing body appearance, should we focus on our goal daily or imagine once and let go? Because I feel healing process is progressive and doesn’t come out of the blue in most cases.
Viktoria: Who says an illness is incurable? Only if you believe that an illness is incurable will it become incurable.
When it comes to your SATS scene, there is only one person that can decide on this. I can give you a “hack” that pretty much works for anyone: imagine somebody congratulating you on getting your hearing back. Congratulatory scenes are the scenes that resonate with most people. You also don’t have to imagine complete hearing if you use a congratulatory scene.
If you want to imagine something more personal, you can do that as well. Because I don’t know what would feel natural to you, I can’t tell you what to imagine. You have to decide it on your own. Here are some ideas, though: your doctor telling you your hearing is completely normal now, your family rejoicing upon hearing these good news, your friends rejoicing as well, simply being thankful that your hearing is back… Bottom line is, you don’t have to imagine the process of healing. You only have to imagine already being healed.
As far as imagining once and letting go in order to change your physical appearance goes, can you truly believe that the thing is done if you imagine it only once? When we are changing things that seem important to us, it often takes more than one repetition. I understand what you are saying and if I were you, I would imagine until it felt natural and I didn’t feel the need to imagine it anymore because my mental diet would automatically align with my wish fulfilled.
8) My question is about “changing a person” and “they aren’t thinking anything.” I have a flatmate who is my friend. I have lately been learning about the fact that he has no free will in my reality and he has to act according to my beliefs. I have been practicing in my mind getting him to do things. I have successfully done it with him singing along to a song (in my mind intending he will) but other times when I want him to hang out or do something with me (all using mental conversations), he will say things that “He wants to be alone” and even has said to me without any prompt, “You can’t tell me what to do I have free will.” So my question is I know we can get people to do what we ask but I am really trying to get it to happen a lot faster for myself. I know they say persist until we get it but if I want him to go to a film that is at 5:00 and it doesn’t happen, I am unsure what to do as clearly I didn’t get my result but sometimes you do want things to happen in a timeframe including manifesting your friend to go to the cinema at xyz time or to do things.
Ivana: Yes, persistence is the key and I know very well what it feels like when you “fail” to get something in a certain timeframe. This is why I don’t concern myself with the timeframes anymore. Think back and tell me, what were you thinking when you had a timeframe? Did you keep checking the clock? Did you keep waiting for him to say something by a certain time? Often times the part about living in the end and thinking from the end gets lost on us when we have a timeframe and that’s why we fail to manifest. We keep checking the time but we forget that if we’ve already decided that it’s happening, then it has to happen.
It’s much better to come from a place of confidence. “Okay, I declared this, so it’s happening.” After that, you keep thinking from the end, disregarding the timeframe. Instead of checking the time, you are thinking from the premises of him already having agreed to see the movie with you at 5 PM.
Think about it: when you ask somebody else to go with you and they say yes, are your thoughts revolving around the time, around the fact that they said yes, around the fact that they already answered? No, you are probably thinking about what you are going to wear, what makeup you are going to put on, which shoes you are going to choose, what time do you have to leave the house in order to get there in time,… That’s the place you want to come from when it comes to manifesting with a timeframe: with confidence that it’s done and that this person is showing up.
Now, as far as him saying things like, “I have free will” to you go, do remember that the world is yourself pushed out. He is only doing what you think he is doing. In this case, you may have some “residue beliefs” about free will. If you do not, then it’s surely a past manifestation and shouldn’t be given any attention because you now know that there is no free will. You also may have an underlying belief that he is a loner or an introvert and that’s why you are getting situations where he is telling you that he wants to be alone.
Examine your beliefs on a wider scale: your general beliefs as well. Are you thinking that people don’t have time for you when you want them to come somewhere with you? Are you thinking that you always get stood up? Any beliefs along these lines could be affecting your manifesting process. I do believe that specific beliefs are more powerful than the general beliefs but you may be getting results that go back and forth if you are affirming that he wants to go with you but then you may go to your other friends and complain that he is a loner or that you always get stood up by people (complaining one of these general beliefs).
9) Also can someone explain the “lack of free will and they aren’t thinking anything concept”? I’ve seen teachers mention that “other” isn’t thinking anything and I can decide and assume what they are thinking. I want to improve upon this. For example, when I was manifesting my SP I remember saying, “Other women make him physically sick.” Kinda like Voldemort in Harry Potter; the two of us share a connection and he can’t touch anyone. I decided that other women, the thought of any romantic activity with someone that wasn’t me would cause him to be physically ill. He just couldn’t do that to me because he loves me and is faithful to me and the thought of being with anyone else causes him stomach pains. Well one day after saying this we were hanging out and he said to me, “I’m sick of girls.” I said what about me? He said to me, “Well you’re a part of me.” Just like I’d been affirming. So I’m sure I’m answering my own question but just to confirm if I decide, “He’s 100% devoted to me.” Then he is? Or “He thinks I am gorgeous and the most beautiful woman in the world.” And he will.
Ivana: Well, here’s the thing. This can be hard to comprehend and yes, you did answer your own question. I don’t think they are incapable of thinking in general. I don’t think their minds are blank until I decide that they are thinking this or that and that’s when they start thinking.
The way I see it: they are thinking what I think they are thinking about a certain subject. If I think they are always thinking loving thoughts about me, then that’s what they’re doing. If I think they don’t like their job, then they may come to me and complain about their job. I’ve had these experiences before but it’s not like I was constantly “putting” these thoughts into this person’s head. I wasn’t constantly thinking, “Oh, he must hate his job”. I just thought he couldn’t be too happy with his job because it doesn’t really fit into the idea that I have about him. Three weeks later he came to me complaining about his unfair boss. Two months later, he quit his job and found a better one.
Technically, you can decide what they’re thinking about. For example, I decide that my boyfriend is always thinking about me and about his job. Those are the only things on his mind. How do I know it’s working? Well, he can’t stop talking about these things. Does it mean he never has any other thoughts, about other subjects? Well yeah, I could declare that but I don’t want him to neglect his family life and his friends, so I word it differently. I have witnessed people deciding that their person is thinking about this and this only. Their person would come to them and they would confess to only thinking about this thing that they’ve “planted” into their thoughts. Considering there is no other in this world, and that it always comes down to what you are doing in your mind, I do think it’s possible to do such things and that’s why I’m seeing evidence of them.
You don’t have to subscribe to this idea just because somebody else does, though. You can decide that when they are thinking about you, they are only thinking loving thoughts. You can decide that when they are thinking about their job, they are only thinking about how much they enjoy it. Things like that! This way you don’t eliminate other thoughts. You still leave it “open” for them to have thoughts about their family, friends, other people, hobbies, sports, whatever they enjoy.
Anyway, yes! If you decide that he is 100% devoted to you, you are giving him that role and he has to play it. If you think that he thinks that you are gorgeous, he thinks that you are. Sustain these thoughts and, in my experience, sooner or later he will confess to having them.
10) After clearing every step of my dream job I got rejected in interview… What can I do now to get my dream job?
Ivana: It’s not over until you say it’s over! Do you want to give up on this job now? You have a choice. You always have a choice. I know you may be discouraged at this moment but we found Neville and all these tools so we can make our lives better.
Do you still want that job? Okay, revise what happened. Revise it and continue being on a mental diet. This can be a bridge of incidents. We don’t have to concern ourselves with it. What we do is we keep focusing on the end. “Oh, they realized their mistake and they called me back to tell me I got the job after all” or, “I remember when they rejected me by accident but now I am working there.”
It’s up to you to decide whether you want to say that this is the end of that story and give up or you want to persist because this could just be a bridge of incidents, for all you know. Bridges of incidents can be completely discouraging and leading to something completely contradicting to what we want and then suddenly take the turn for the better and things just fall into place. In that case, it’s a matter of persistence! You got this. I will imagine you sending us another email telling us you got the job after all!
11) If I am trying to manifest a SP/a job, etc. and I have complete faith that it is done but at the same time I am disturbed (unwanted state) by 3D with regards to some other aspect of my life, does my manifestation get affected? Or can I assume that it won’t and hence it won’t? In other words must one’s overall state be that of the wish fulfilled or can it be a different state for different desires?
Viktoria: No, it doesn’t affect this other area if you declare that it does not. Of course, all areas of our lives are interconnected and when you are in the state of the wish fulfilled in which you are married, for example, then you may find yourself treating your friends differently, having different conversations with your family, looking at your career and place of living differently etc. But just because it encompasses your entire life, doesn’t mean that while you are manifesting it, it has to be affected by other areas of your life.
Of course you can be in the best relationship ever and financially broke. You can also be rich and unhappy. Ideally, you would balance these things out so that you are successful in all areas of your life but not being successful in one area of your life doesn’t indicate that you will be unsuccessful in other areas of your life. This is the reason why we see people complaining mostly about one area of their life. Most often, they either want to improve their love life or their finances. Sometimes those that want to improve their love lives have no trouble manifesting money and vice versa.
12) Is it possible to change someone’s sexuality? I am a straight woman and my SP is a gay man. I have hesitated to ask this question for a while now because I was so afraid of being judged. I have thought about it a lot, and it is not about changing him, I just want a chance to be with the person I love.
Ivana: When you say it’s not about him, are you suggesting that your actual goal is just a loving relationship? In that case, you don’t have to worry about this SP at all and you can just set a general intention to find somebody who will treat you like a queen and love you the most in the world, and whatever else you want from your relationship.
I do think it’s possible because I believe in the existence of parallel realities. If you can conceive something in your mind, it must exist in one of these parallel realities. If you can imagine him being interested in girls, that version of him must exist. All you have to do is focus on it until it shows up. For all we know, he could come out as bi (if not straight) tomorrow. How many times did we see somebody go from being straight to being gay? Maybe you noticed the same thing in your reality, I do not know. But I am thinking, if one can turn gay after considering themselves to be straight their entire life, then it must work both ways.
I had a gay guy tell me he would date me if he was straight and I always found it amusing that he said that because I did have thoughts like, “He would totally be into me if he wasn’t gay.” So, yeah, right off the bat, I created this barrier with him being gay. But since I am not interested in having a romantic relationship with him, I have never tested it, so this is as far as my experience goes. Hope it helps you anyway!
Thank you to everyone who submitted questions for this month’s Q&A! You can start submitting your questions for the January Q&A here. The January Q&A post will be out sooner than this one was. We both got busy during holidays and couldn’t answer all the questions earlier.
We wish you all a happy 2020 and we intend for everyone reading this to get their desires in the next year, as well as learn how to manifest as effortlessly as possible! Lots of love to everyone.